Dealing with Narcissistic Abuse

In a recent blog, I talked about what it was like to live with a narcissist and how to identify narcissistic abuse.  But how do you deal with that abuse once you realize that you’re living with a narcissist? Here are 4 ways to survive narcissistic abuse.


  1. Speak up.

Abuse can only continue when there is silence.  Abusers rely on shame and fear to keep you from speaking out.  Once you stand your ground and start to talk openly about the abuse you’re suffering, they can’t keep getting away with it.


2. Set boundaries.

People can only treat you the way you allow them to.  If you want the abuse to stop, you need to make it very clear that you will not accept being treated in certain ways.  When you set clear boundaries, you establish rules for what you will allow into your life. Clear boundaries can make a major difference in your life and how you are treated, but only if you do Number 3…


3. Follow through.

It’s great to set a boundary and say what you are and what you are not willing to put up with.  But the truth is that boundaries are meaningless unless you follow through with them. If you allow your boundaries to be broken and still remain in your relationship, then nothing is going to change.  You’ll need to follow through on your boundaries and let them know that if they’re broken, there are going to have to be real consequences. 


4. Get help.

If you feel like you are being abused by a narcissist, you need to get help.  Turn to a therapist or counselor to help you figure out how to deal with the situation.  You don’t have to do it alone. In fact, you shouldn’t do it alone.

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